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| Mike Hosey, Elder |
Last week I was feeling miserably down. It wasn't a full blown clinical depression, of course. In fact, it was nowhere near it. But I was down. I was experiencing what philosophers call "existential angst."
That's a big fancy, weird term that means, "anxiety
that comes from feeling like life is meaningless, and that I'm responsible for
giving meaning to life in the midst of that meaninglessness, and I can't figure
out what I'm supposed to do in order to meet that responsibility."
Whew! That's a mouthful!
Along with it, I had all of the hallmarks that come with all
kinds of depressions: Sadness. Self
Loathing. Recurring, unchallenged negative thoughts. A dulled sensitivity to pleasure. A questioning of my competence. Heck, a
questioning of my reason for existence (thus, the existential angst).
A few of these things are incompatible with a healthy
Christian walk. In truth, these emotional irritations were on the verge of stopping
whatever work God had in store for me for the next several days - or longer.
In His providence, God sent me a fellow Christian.
That man started a conversation with me one afternoon as I
was watching my kids play in the park.
He told me of his successful business,
and how he had come to our country from an oppressive one - which was
inspirational by itself.
But as we exchanged names, he recognized me from my past
public writings. Those writings had encouraged him somehow, and so he took time
to encourage me. It was nice to hear his kind words and receive his gratitude. He
lifted my mood, and forced me to challenge those negative thoughts.
That reminded me of how the Bible tells us to encourage one
another (1 Thessalonians 5:11), and to inspire one another toward good works
(Hebrews 10:23-25). These actions equip us to
continue God's work in a hostile world.
And that prompted me to be thankful for how many good people
at Fellowship choose to do those things, rather than unduly criticize, tear
down, complain or plant the seeds of dissension - which God hates (Proverbs
6:16-19)!
Wow! I didn't get that from you at all when I saw you on Sunday. I can relate though. Things aren't all that great in our life right now and I find myself waking up in the middle of the night unable to get back to sleep worrying about things. Thanks for this encouraging word. It makes me realize that when I'm feeling inferior to you leader types that seem to have it all together, I'm not really alone. (plus, I get the same way around my birthday too)
ReplyDeleteThanks Julie for reading. I promise you that even the staunchest of us "leader types" have these moments from time to time. Anyway, I'm keeping you and Ray in my prayers. Thanks again.
DeleteThanks for sharing this Michael! I can definitly relate!
ReplyDeleteI have struggled with depression off and on for the last 4 years.
It's soo crippling some days. Don't want to get out of bed and feeling hopeless.
I try to encourage people around me everyday! It is very important for us to encourage one another. What a blessing to have some one come to you and tell you that your words helped them!
Be Blessed,
Cheryl
Thanks Cheryl. I hope all is going with you up there in the near great white north!
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